Dear Readers: I received a book in the mail that definitely lives up to the accompanying press release. “The Daughter Trap: Taking Care of Mom and …You,” is written by Laurel Kennedy, founder of the Boomer consulting firm Age Lessons. Kennedy has an impressive resume in the business world, but our concern is elder care.
“Daughter Trap,” is likely to annoy or even anger some readers, but most will nod their heads with some understanding of Kennedy’s thesis that it’s the women who become caregivers, whether or not they are ready, willing or even realistically able.
Read more about "Daughter Trap":
I have not read Ms. Kennedy's book, yet I can see why it might be controversial to some, including in the caregiving community. Ms, Kennedy clearly did not interview the extraordinary male caregivers I have known who have been hands-on, missed many days of work, spent many sleepless nights, personally thought about and bought adaptive equipment for their elders, and so much more. There may have been a time where more male caregivers wrote checks and left it at that. I am fortunate to know many unapid family caregivers who are male who have outdone themselves in the details of care done their own way.
I also agree with your comment that many caregivers care for our loved ones because we love them. Others care for their loved ones because whether they love them, or not, they are exemplifying the daily rule in their lives, living as they would want others to do for them if the shoe were on the other foot.
If I am understanding the underlying premise of Ms. Kennedy's book correctly, I do agree that women and men are socialized differently, which in turn is likely to affect who steps up to the caregiving plate later in life, or who assumes the role by default.
Your book review is a great read and engaging. Thanks for making Ms. Kennedy's book public through your well-written review.
Posted by: IsabelCares | Tuesday, June 08, 2010 at 11:13 AM