,,,Once, when I asked Mom why she stayed in her room except when she walked down the hall to visit Dad, she said she didn't want to socialize with all those "old people." Mom was never a social snob. All I could think of was that she was in denial. In her mind, if she didn't socialize with the others, then she wouldn't have to admit to herself that she was one of "them." As time went on, I did make some progress with Mom, mainly by helping her feel useful.
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Wonderful! You are doing well to encourage her. Patience is important. It's amazing that some people will begin to enjoy things they never would have done before - like your mom and bingo. She'll find her way. However loneliness and grief is a part of aging. Compassion for their losses, while encouraging activity, can slowly help. She'll find her way.
Carol
Posted by: Carol Bradley Bursack | Sunday, July 15, 2012 at 05:43 AM
My dad also passed away recently (Sep 2011) after being in a nursing home for 9 months. My mom, age 88, has moved to an assisted living place near me. She likes not having to worry about the house or bills or anything. But unfortunately she is not interested in anything else either. She sleeps quite a bit and has issues with losing her balance and falling. She's using a walker, has been evaluated and been through PT, been fitted with hearing aids, been to doctor, dentist, eye doctor etc.
But I have noticed she is starting to participate in Bingo - of all things. Yesterday when I took her to the eye doctor, she has brought along some money to buy one of the other residents some Diet Coke. It looks like, and I sure hope so, that she is becoming more interested in her neighbors.
I'd love to hear some tips on little things I can do to continue to bring her out of her depression/grief.
Posted by: Debbie V. | Saturday, July 14, 2012 at 08:20 PM