Dear Carol: My mother’s dementia is taking a toll on both of us. There are times when she doesn’t understand what is happening around her, so she gets angry, calls me names and even accuses me of stealing. Other times, she seems very clear, but those times are almost worse for me because she says things like “Just give me something to end this.” Five minutes later, she’s back to being mad at me or anyone else near her. I don’t know which extreme is harder to cope with. Isn’t there a way to find some middle ground with this disease? - Jan
Dear Jan: I understand and strongly sympathize with your desire to get things normalized again, since I’ve been in similar situations myself. This is a high wire act with a lot of discomfort. While there may be no effective treatment, there are ways to try and manage things.