Dear Carol: I feel guilty because I don’t want be a caregiver for my elderly mother. I’m an only child, and since my father died she’s come to rely on me more than she needs to. She’s healthy and has plenty of money. She has friends, though she seems to prefer leaning on me. She was controlling and emotionally abusive when I was growing up, so we don’t have a great relationship, but I’m willing to help her out, and naturally I am on call for emergencies. I just don’t want to become her sole caregiver.