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April 2015

Our family's introduction to dementia was different than the typical case. Most people with dementia will decline slowly, giving loved ones time to adjust. However, no time frame makes accepting dementia easy. Read more →


Whatever the reason that caregiving begins, I hear from a number of young adults who are trying to care for one or more grandparents. Most of them love their grandparent dearly, but they often come up against obstacles that are quite overwhelming for people so young. Read more →


Dear Carol: I’m trying to determine whether or not it’s wise to take my mom out to public events or even to family gatherings. She has middle stage dementia. When I took her to her grandson’s program last Christmas she became upset and agitated, yet when I recently took her to a music event in the park she enjoyed it. Now, we’re looking at this same grandson’s high school graduation. Read more →


Then, there's simple boredom. As people age, they may suffer from chronic pain. They may struggle with reading or puzzles because of poor eyesight. They get tired of TV. These elders may not be clinically depressed, but with no schedule to keep and not much going on in their lives, they slide into the habit of napping most of the day. Read more →


Fearing that their aging parents could be injured, caregivers can become nagging nannies who struggle to stop Dad from working in his beloved shop or Mom from gardening. Insisting that elders avoid all risks compromises their loved ones’ dignity and often their joy. Read more →


brief time after Dad's death, Mom's own terminal condition required hospice care in order to control her pain. She had told me numerous times that she was tired of living and ready to "go." Yet, I believe it still was hard for her to accept that she needed hospice care and what that meant. Read more →


More probably, the mother’s nasty personality issues, perhaps helped along with a history of having been abused herself or by a type of mental illness, will still be abusive to the daughter. She will still manipulate, scold, complain, put down, and in general try to make the caregiving daughter feel like nothing is good enough. Read more →