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Loving Daughter Views Disease Through a Different Lens Than Nursing Home Staff


Dear Carol: I’m watching my mom decline from Parkinson’s disease complicated by Lewy body dementia (LBD). She has good medical care and lives in a nursing home that has been a blessing to us all. I try to imitate the way that the staff works with her because they seem well trained. The problem is Mom is not just another patient to me. She is my mother. I want to fight what this disease is doing, and sometimes that makes me forget how I should work with Mom’s disease, especially when it comes to her LBD. I just can’t accept what’s happening. I know that my feelings are irrational because her disease can’t be cured. Am I strange for feeling happy with her care on days when she seems okay, but mad at other times? What’s wrong with me that I can’t be like these people and just accept that Mom can’t be cured and learn to help her so that I can let go of my anger? Marianne

Read full column on Inforum about how families must struggle more for acceptance of disease symptoms:

Purchase Minding Our Elders: Caregivers Share Their Personal Stories – paperback or ebook

The stories in this fine book showed us how others have gone through similar things with their families and that is somehow reassuring. There are some helpful suggestions but mostly there is the recognition that others went through the same thing. All we can do is our best. That is greatly reassuring during these difficult emotional times. If you are a caregiver, this is a must read. - Delores Edwards


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Thank you for letting me know that you enjoyed it, Molly! I always appreciate hearing how certain posts affect people but I know that it takes extra time to respond. Your words touched me.

A beautiful post and one that I'm sure so many daughters and families may relate to. Thank you for sharing!

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