Caregiver or Care Partner? How Terminology Evolves With Awareness
People with Dementia Can Easily Be Undertreated for Pain

Many people can't be the "sainted" caregivers they often hear about


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Dear Carol: My husband and I are retired and were enjoying our quiet life when my fiercely independent 89-year-old mother started showing signs of dementia. We felt that it was best for her to move in with us and she reluctantly agreed. Mother’s been in our home for seven months and, while my husband is a saint, I’m not. She’s driving me crazy. She tries to cook and I spend hours cleaning up from burned food and dumped wastebaskets. She tries to do her own personal care in the bathroom and dumps things in the toilet and then flushes so we’ve needed a plumber twice, so far. She has dropped and broken my makeup bottles leaving huge messes. She wants to eat in the living room and spills and rubs the mess into the couch. I’ve tried to talk to her but she says that she’s used to her own life. I know this isn’t her fault and that I’m supposed to be patient, but I’m not a natural caregiver. This makes me feel guilty but there you have it. Am I that unusual or do we live in a world of saints? – BD

 Read the full column on Inforum about caregivers feeling that she aren't good enough:

MedicareFAQ – Medicare Resource Center

Support a caregiver or jump-start discussion in support groups with real stories - for bulk orders of Minding Our Elders e-mail Carol: 

Photo credit Deniz Altindas: Unsplash

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