Senior Housing Feed

Some Caregivers Are Also Elders: The Challenges of Caring for the Very Old

PhoneDear Carol: I am the last surviving child of my nearly 94-year-old mother who insists on living in her own home. She’s in relatively good health for 94. I don’t have a problem with her in her staying in her home except that she expects me to be there for hours every day and at the drop of a hat at night. She won’t accept hired help. I am in my 70s and widowed. A woman friend of mine and I have dreamed of taking a cruise but I can’t go because of my mother. I never talk with her about this because I don’t want to hurt her, but is this what loving our parents is about? I have some health problems of my own, and somedays I feel that she’ll outlive me. Where do we draw the line? MK

Read more on Inforum about how elderly caregivers struggle to care for their very old parents:

Support a caregiver or jump start discussion in support groups with real stories - for bulk orders of Minding Our Elders e-mail Carol

Global Alzheimer’s Study Now Enrolling


Individual Attention Important Benefit of Alzheimer’s Eating Study

FAtherSonIt’s natural for caregivers to worry if their loved one is getting sufficient nourishment. People with dementia are often a challenge because they forget to eat, or they may have problems remembering how to transfer food from the plate to their mouths. Some people have trouble chewing and swallowing, especially during later stages of dementia.

Read more on HealthCentral about a study that shows how much difference individual attention can make in eating: 

Purchase Minding Our Elders: Caregivers Share Their Personal Stories – paperback or ebook

“I hold onto your book as a life preserver and am reading it slowly on purpose...I don't want it to end.”  Craig William Dayton, Film Composer

Global Alzheimer’s Study Now Enrolling


Overcoming the Guilt of Placing a Loved One in a Home

AnxietyFor many caregivers, placing an elder in a home spells failure on the part of the caregiver. Even when carers know they've done all they can, a subconscious nagging voice often tells them they are giving up on their parents or spouse. I'm here to tell you that you are not giving up. You are just getting help. 

Read more on HealthCentral about overcoming the guilt of placing someone in a nursing home:

Purchase Minding Our Elders: Caregivers Share Their Personal Stories – paperback or ebook

“I hold onto your book as a life preserver and am reading it slowly on purpose...I don't want it to end.”  Craig William Dayton, Film Composer

Global Alzheimer’s Study Now Enrolling


Aging in Place or Assisted Living: It’s About Choices

GrandmotherDaughterAccording to an AARP survey, the vast majority of boomers have stated that they want to stay in their current homes rather than move to another setting for their later years. This attitude has been the springboard for many aging in place advocates as well as businesses like contractors and high tech companies.  It’s not hard to understand why 60-year-olds would say that they want to remain in their home for life rather than move to assisted living or a nursing home. These are generally people who are relatively healthy and feel that they can hire help for whatever they need down the road. 

Read more on HealthCentral about living choices as we age:

Purchase Minding Our Elders: Caregivers Share Their Personal Stories – paperback or ebook

“I hold onto your book as a life preserver and am reading it slowly on purpose...I don't want it to end.”  Craig William Dayton, Film Composer

Global Alzheimer’s Study Now Enrolling


Do You Regret Cohabitating with Aging Parents?

Emotions...you would always take care of her. After all, she always cared for you. Or, even though she wasn't a very good mother, and you never really got along, one cares for one's own, right? Or, your mother was pretty healthy and doing okay and you were divorced and trying to take care of two children, so you moved in with your mother. She cared for the kids for awhile, but then began showing signs of strange behavior. You feared for your kids, your mother and yourself. "What have I gotten myself into?" You thought.

Read more on Agingcare about how you feel about cohabitating with your aging parents:

Support a caregiver or jump start discussion in support groups with real stories - for bulk orders of Minding Our Elders e-mail Carol

Global Alzheimer’s Study Now Enrolling


Should Someone with Alzheimer's Move to Another State?

Bridge3

Dear Carol: My husband and I hate northern winters and vowed to move south when we retired. Anywhere warm. Now, with retirement near, my husband has developed younger onset Alzheimer’s disease. He’s still in an early stage so we are unsure about whether it’s best to stay where we are or to go ahead with our plans. If we move, should we move now or wait? We hate to scrap our dream but we don’t want to make things worse for him. What do you think? - Amy

Read more on Inforum about moving when someone has Alzheimer's:

Support a caregiver or jump start discussion in support groups with real stories - for bulk orders e-mail Carol


Should We Tell Elders With Dementia That Family Home Must Be Sold?

Farm

Dear Carol: My mother has been in a nursing home for two years because of strokes and vascular dementia combined with Alzheimer’s. It’s obvious that she’ll never go home. Dad died years ago, but Mom stayed in the family home where we kids grew up. While my siblings and I know that this house must be sold to pay for the nursing home, Mom talks about the house and going back to it. Do we tell her that we have to sell it or do we just pretend that it’s still hers? I hate being dishonest with her, but I know that she’ll be talking about the house and she’ll be terribly upset if we tell her we’re selling it.  How do we handle this? - Dave

Read more on Inforum about selling the family home:

Purchase Minding Our Elders: Caregivers Share Their Personal Stories – paperback or ebook

“I hold onto your book as a life preserver and am reading it slowly on purpose...I don't want it to end.”  Craig William Dayton, Film Composer


Aging in Place or Assisted Living: It’s About Choices

WetdryAccording to an AARP survey, the vast majority of boomers have stated that they want to stay in their current homes rather than move to another setting for their later years. This attitude has been the springboard for many aging in place advocates as well as businesses like contractors and high tech companies. It’s not hard to understand why 60-year-olds would say that they want to remain in their home for life rather than move to assisted living or a nursing home. These are generally people who are relatively healthy and feel that they can hire help for whatever they need down the road.

Read more on HealthCentral about aging in place and other choices:

Support a caregiver or jump start discussion in support groups with real stories - for bulk orders e-mail Carol: 


6 Tips To Modify Financial Stress on Alzheimer's Families

Contract-signing-10044619Alzheimer's and dementia caregivers had $9.3 billion in additional health care costs of their own in the same year. Nearly 60 percent of Alzheimer's and dementia caregivers rate the emotional stress of caregiving as high or very high, and more than one-third report symptoms of depression. Remember, this is just the cost for caregivers. 

Read more on HealthCentral about financial drain on Alzheimer's families:

Find local resources for walk-in tubs: 

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Caregiver of Elder Requires Caregiver of Her Own

LilypadDear Carol: I’m a single woman who was forced into early retirement because of multiple sclerosis. My mother has been a widow for years and I’m her only living child so we’re very close. She recently had two strokes and has residual issues so I had her move in with me. We get along well, but I’m finding that I can’t take care of her needs without worsening my own health. We’ve been looking at different options for care and Mom is fine with whatever we need to do. I know that I'm being irrational, but I feel guilty that I can’t take care of her by myself. Where do I start to make changes? M.L.B.

Continue reading on Inforum about graduated living options:

Find local resources for walk-in tubs:

Purchase Minding Our Elders: Caregivers Share Their Personal Stories – paperback or ebook

“I hold onto your book as a life preserver and am reading it slowly on purpose...I don't want it to end.”  Craig William Dayton, Film Composer