Senior Housing Feed

Talking with our elderly loved ones about how and where they would choose to live their remaining years can be more than awkward. It can be frightening. For many, it’s not as much the fear of the elders’ reactions to our words as it is an effort to preserve our own denial. If we don’t voice the fact that our parents are aging and may eventually need assistance, and then, yes, die — it won’t happen. This is a version of covering our eyes when we were small and saying “you can’t see me.” Read more →

I’m struggling with trying to find answers on how I can help my elderly mother. I’m 67, I’m retired and I live an hour away from my 87-year-old mom who has heart failure. Mom still lives alone in her house and this is very important to her. As her condition has worsened, she’s required more help from my sister who lives just 10 minutes away. My sister runs all of mom’s errands, completes all of her chores, and checks in on her several times a day. On top of this, my sister still works full time and won’t be able to retire for a three more years. I visit mom a couple times a month to give my sister a rest, but I fear as moms health continues to fail, that won't be enough. I feel guilty for not doing more but I am too far away. I love the town I live in as it is close to my daughter and grandchildren. Should I move? – BT Read more →

It’s well known that untreated hearing loss has emotional and social consequences, such as isolation and depression, especially among older adults. The not-for-profit Front Porch Center for Innovation and Wellbeing is always looking for new ways to help seniors living in Front Porch’s residential communities. Read more →

Dear Carol: After my mom died last year I stepped in to take care of my 83-year-old dad. I know that I spoiled him at first because of his devastation over losing Mom, but now he’s used to my taking over the “wife” role. I pay his bills, take him shopping, cook his meals, clean, and spend nearly every day, all day, with him. When I’m leaving to go back home to my husband, who is retired and has his own health problems, Dad wants to know when I’ll be back. He knows the answer will be tomorrow, but he asks anyway. Dad's healthy and strong, but he needs some assistance, yet he fights my suggestions. How do I get off of this merry-go-round? – CT Read more →

Dear Carol: My mother has been in rehab since she broke her hip but now she needs to be moved. The professionals, including her doctor, strongly encourage moving her to a nursing home close to me because Mom will continue to need extensive care and her condition is expected to decline. When Mom and I discuss this, she seems sad about the idea and says she wants to go to her own home even though it’s not elder friendly. Read more →

If we don’t voice the fact that our parents are aging and may eventually need assistance, and then, yes, die — it won’t happen. This is a version of covering our eyes when we were small and saying “you can’t see me.” Read more →

Sex and death. It's odd that those two topics should bring so much anxiety to parents and children. But, there you have it. One – sex – is about the beginning of life. The other – death – is about the end. Both are a part of the lifecycle, but if anything, sex is easier for many to discuss than death. Read more →

It’s not hard to understand why 60-year-olds would say that they want to remain in their home for life rather than move to assisted living or a nursing home. These are generally people who are relatively healthy and feel that they can hire help for whatever they need down the road. Indeed, aging in place sounds like a wonderful concept. What could possibly be wrong with it?  Read more →

... So, with some guilt, we start looking at other options. For some people, this means having your parents move in with you. If there is enough room so everyone has privacy and the personalities blend, this can work. However, before making such a move, make sure your head is as engaged as your heart. While you are considering this option, you also may want to read "Living With Elderly Parents: Do You Regret the Decision?" Read more →

Dear Carol: My mom moved into the memory unit of an assisted living last year and she loves it. She’s very social so this environment is perfect for her. Now, my brother has suddenly decided that he wants Mom to come and stay with him for the winter since he lives in a warmer climate. He’s the man so he has the Power Of Attorney. Mom doesn’t want to leave her comfortable little apartment, but she’s said if he really wants her there for a time, she should do it. My fear is that the move could make her dementia worse. My brother says he just wants to spend more time with Mom, but he's never been that close so the only true motivation that I can see is that he knows how expensive AL is and he’s struggling financially. I think that he wants to save the estate money. I’m not trying to keep Mom in my town to be selfish. I just want her happy. How do I handle this? – SD Read more →