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Do You Regret the Decision to Live With Your Older Parent?

CaregiverCreditsydney-sims-519706-unsplashPhoto credit Sydney Sims

...Regardless of who moves in with whom, the decision to cohabitate with aging parents is a serious one that affects all relationships within a family, careers, finances and the physical and mental health of everyone involved. For some, the arrangement works out fine. Two or even three generations residing in the same home can be a good thing. It works best when there is plenty of space so that everyone has some degree of privacy when there is respect for one another when there is plenty of cooperation and when respite is built into the arrangement from the beginning. Adequate planning beforehand is crucial for success.

Read the full article on Agingcare to learn more about the regrets that some people have for cohabitating with their aging parent:

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Hi Anne,
I'm so glad that this worked out for you. You gave up a lot to do this - especially your privacy and the ability to have some time away. That's a common problem for someone in your circumstance. Your nursing background was of enormous benefit to your parents.

I hope that you've been able to move on with your own life now. You've more than earned it.

I do not regret looking after my mother who was terminally ill. I looked after the step-father as well. I lived in their lovely home. It was difficult not working. I did get government assistance, so I did receive some money. They were diabetics. Mum had to have soft foods.

I did shopping, housework and all the other things that were necessary to keep things up to date. One of the trials of being at home with them was getting a few hours off,to spend time in another space like a shopping mall or having a coffee at a cafe. The problem being they didn't like being left.

Family were working and left it up to me to work things out. I have a nursing background so this helped a lot because of Mums problems. We always had the ambulance rushing to the house. Either the step-father had a serious fall or Mum would need help.

I value this time looking after them. I had a rough time with mum when I was growing up. Over time I became more compassionate,understanding and willing to make amends for the past. I have no regrets. I looked after Mum and the step father for three years.

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