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April 2020
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June 2020

Dear KB: You and other caregivers are facing impossible choices, now, and it’s a heartbreaking situation with no clear answers. You recognize that someone like your mom shouldn’t be alone, but every choice you look at is risky. It’s not enough Read more →


You sound like a caring daughter with understandable concerns. If it’s any comfort, parents resisting help is a common problem faced by adult children. For some, the concern is about cognitive problems, which thankfully isn’t Read more →


Dear JTR: Your story is heartbreaking. No child should have to grow up as you did, but we know that it happens all too often. You didn’t say if you’d sought counseling so that you could work toward your own emotional healing, but if you haven’t I will suggest that upfront. Read more →


“Pharmacologic agents including oral estrogens, alpha-blockers, sedative-hypnotics, antidepressants, antipsychotics, ACE inhibitors, loop diuretics, nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory drugs, and calcium channel blockers have been implicated to some degree in the onset or exacerbation of urinary incontinence.” Read more →


While your loved one’s overwhelmingly negative attitude is certainly frustrating, it’s important to understand that a person’s real and perceived levels of independence and control over their life are forever changed when they begin needing a caregiver’s help. Read more →


Dear Erased: I’m deeply sorry! Having your parent forget your name is said by many caregivers to be one of the most painful parts of being a care partner to their parent who is living with dementia. Yet, it’s one of the cruel, nearly predictable realities of some types of dementia, particularly Alzheimer’s. Read more →


Dear GT: This is a challenging spot for an older person to be in but choices like this might be even tougher for adult children to come to terms with. The fact is, while you and your siblings want the best for your dad, what “best” means for your dad is up to him. Read more →


Dear Fearing: You truly have your hands full. Preventing burnout is the right approach because like so many things, backing off once you are completely immersed in them presents even more problems. I hope that you can put a plan in place that will work for the long haul. Here are some strategies that might help: Read more →


As with so many things regarding our aging parents, you could consider how you are approaching your mom. You might think that you are doing so with compassion and gentleness, but it’s possible that your frustration is showing. Read more →