Tips on How to Handle Controlling Older Parents
Not Every Child Can Be a Long-Term Caregiver

Parent Doesn’t Want to Live with Adult Child and Family


Photo credit BBH

Dear Carol: You seem to be level-headed in your answers to adult children so I’m writing to you even though I’m the parent. Here’s my situation: I’m 78-years-old, and for several years I’ve lived in a retirement complex that I truly enjoy. It’s the type that can offer me assisted living services if/when I need them. I wasn’t particularly active in the community prior to the COVID-19 pandemic because I prefer lone activity, a fact that’s made adjusting to our current isolation easy for me. My health is good. I’m an enthusiastic reader and can order library books online that my family will drop off. I’m computer literate and take part in online groups for both enjoyment and education. My church groups are also online. In summary, I am content. The problem is that, because of COVID-19, my daughter’s family has been begging me to move in them. They’re doing this because they love me and I deeply appreciate that because I love them, too, with all my heart. I just don’t want to live with them or anyone else. We visit over video on Sundays and we message daily. Am I selfish for wanting to stay in my own apartment where I’m comfortable and happy?  - SL

Continue reading on Inforum for more insight into differences in older adults and their choices in living arrangements:

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