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Controlling Older Parents? Here Are Some Survival Tips

Alexandre-debieve-330094-unsplashPhoto credit Alexandre Debieve

The responsibility of providing care for an aging or ill loved one is a monumental challenge in its own right. But when a care recipient is domineering about how and when every single task is done, it’s bound to exasperate their family caregiver(s). Maybe your controlling elderly mother demands that you keep her company around the clock, but she certainly won’t watch any of the television shows you enjoy. Your overbearing father might refuse to let you help him bathe, but there’s also no way he’ll ever let a professional bath aid set foot in the house. Perhaps your spouse complains constantly about the food you carefully prepare each day and the clothing you pick out for them every morning. You do all of these things out of love only to be met with disdain. While your loved one’s negative attitude is certainly frustrating, it’s important to understand that an elder’s real and perceived levels of independence and control over their lives are forever changed when they begin needing a caregiver’s help. Achieving a better understanding of what this overbearing behavior stems from could help you cope with their control issues and influence how you respond to their demands. 

Dynamics of the Caregiving Relationship:  Sometimes the difficult dynamics between a caregiver and a care recipient have been deeply ingrained for many years. If your elderly parent or spouse has always been the dominating personality in your relationship, it is likely that their behavior will only worsen as they get older and their health declines...

Continue reading on Agingcare for some tips that may help you find a little peace even with controlling older parents: 

Support a caregiver or jump-start discussion in support groups with real stories - for bulk orders of Minding Our Elders e-mail Carol  

Discover the Difference. EGOSAN - the Top-Rated incontinence brand from Italy. Now Available on Amazon.

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