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A Dementia Spouse Grieves Husband’s Loss of Memory on Their Anniversary


Photo credit Kampus

Dear Carol: Last week marked the anniversary of the day that my husband and I married. Not only didn’t he remember our anniversary, but he doesn’t always understand that I’m his wife. It’s not his fault, of course, it’s his dementia, but that day nearly undid me. I tried to celebrate for the two of us by making a nice dinner, but he has no interest in food now. I even sent us flowers and bought two cards, one for him and one from him, but after I got him to bed, I sat up crying. Although friends tried to help, this can’t be fixed. I’m recovering, of course, that’s what caregivers do, yet a piece of me died that day. Obviously, you can’t fix my pain and I’m not asking you to. I think I’m just writing to make people aware that this is one more painful step in the dementia journey. – PQ

Continue reading on Inforum for more about how difficult it is for a dementia spouse whose husband or wife doesn't remember or understand what anniversaries and special days have meant in their lives:

Minding Our Elders: Caregivers Share Their Personal Stories.“I hold onto your book as a life preserver and am reading it slowly on purpose...I don't want it to end.” ...Craig William Dayton, Film Composer

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