...Get rid of perfectionism. I know that I can be more stressed than I need to be simply because I think I have to do everything right now and do it perfectly. Likely you are similar. Read more →

...My first step is to answer the writer’s email providing whatever comfort and resources I can. Then, depending on their question, I’ll consider the topic in view of the column to decide Read more →

...Nancy had spent years in therapy learning to cope with her childhood issues. Through hard work, she learned to forgive her father for his lack of involvement and the fact that he didn’t put a stop to the abuse her mother doled out. She’d learned that Read more →

...t is so hard to see our parents get older. As they become more physically and/or cognitively challenged, it’s only natural to wish we could take away their struggles. We can offer love and support. We can do our best to anticipate and meet their needs. But, we can’t take away Read more →

...This wall was cluttered with both real and fake accomplishments, but I knew I would need to find room for more. Dad's broken brain would tell him he had earned something else and eventually I would need to produce it. Read more →

Stage 1: No Impairment: Research now reveals that AD begins years, if not decades, before the onset of noticeable symptoms. Genetic research and much more sophisticated medical science Read more →

...There was no time to fully contemplate the far-reaching implications of Dad’s abrupt change in health. Hard decisions had to be made and there was so much to be done that we couldn’t have anticipated. Where should he live now? What kind of immediate care does he need and Read more →

Dear GM: Doctors are trained to cure, which is admirable if a cure is feasible. In many instances, though, giving a patient, particularly an older patient, “more time” at the expense of comfort and family time extends suffering Read more →

...Each time I visited and saw him in such an agitated state, I would hurry from his room back out into the hall to talk with his nurse, Sarita. Had the doctor been in yet? Had he seen Dad like this? Would he please help us get Dad on hospice? Read more →

...This is admirable yet unrealistic thinking. Recent research shows that the average duration of caregiving is a whopping 4.5 years. As time goes by and our loved ones’ care needs mount, we find ourselves spread thinner and thinner. Eventually, we are forced to admit that we can’t raise our families, work our jobs, care for ourselves and provide full-time hands-on care over the long term. So, we regretfully start looking into other options. They need more care than we can single-handedly provide, so we start by making some kind of change to their care plan such as hiring in-home care or enrolling them in adult day care. Read more →