Entries categorized "Assisted Living, Adult Day Services, Nursing Home" Feed

The number of elders for whom I provided primary family care was in excess of average, but the people who have cared for a combination of parents, in-laws, and often a spouse, are legion. Much of this caregiving happens in tandem, so that, for example, after one parent passes the other parent falls apart. Thus, the adult child caregiver doesn’t even have time to properly grieve before thrown, once again, into caregiver mode. Read more →


Dear MH: I can only imagine your worry about how your mom’s care is going. Even without this lockdown preventing visitors and the very real threat of a COVID outbreak in care facilities caregivers have always worried if their loved one is receiving hands-on care that works with their unique needs. Read more →


Dear LH: Your mother is fortunate to have you to watch over her care. Like you, I think that any older adult is likely to feel abandoned if the family moves them to a new living environment and then just leaves without visiting for two weeks. Additionally, people like your mom need an advocate and that advocate must be an obvious, though friendly, presence from the beginning. Read more →


Coronavirus Pandemic Has Caregivers Searching for Answers

I can only imagine your terror if your parents are newly placed in a facility where they haven’t yet been able to settle in, or perhaps worse if they are in a facility that you don’t trust at the best of times. You’ll have to do what we all must at this time and make your best decision based on your personal circumstances. Hard. Incredibly hard. Read more →


"Incontinence affects millions of Americans and is very closely linked to diet, since what someone eats and drinks directly affects their bladder. With that said, people may think drinking less water will help them avoid incontinence, but it may actually increase their risk of urinary tract infections (UTIs), Read more →


Dear BU: Your dad is an example of someone who chose assisted living in part because of the community aspect and the availability of having nearly unending opportunities for dining and interesting activities. Now that easy socialization is gone and even the family can’t visit. My heart goes out to everyone in this situation. Read more →


Nearly all of us have seen images of younger people and/or spouses of people who are now in facilities who can allow no family in as visitors. Standing outside talking with their loved one by cell phone, or even standing outside and holding identifying signs signaling love, is helping some. Read more →


I frequently get e-mails from people whose siblings are happy to let them step up to the plate and handle all of their parents’ care. Yet these same siblings put up a fight when the primary caregivers wish to make changes to the care plan that require even the smallest amount of money. Read more →


While occasionally you’ll meet an elder who willingly turns over all decisions to others, most will continue to want their autonomy. They want to make the decisions that rule their lives. Read more →


Perhaps the most challenging of all is that many caregivers are now trying to care for a parent or spouse in their homes with limited supplies – sometimes limited food choices – and almost no outside contact. These caregivers alternate between fear for their loved ones’ lives and worry about how their parent or spouse will survive if they, the caregiver, becomes sick. Read more →