Entries categorized "Holidays" Feed

The new year is a perfect time to take inventory of your life and see what improvements you can make. My thought is that we can look at the coming year with fresh eyes, even though that freshness may only last a moment.... Read more →


Changes in caregiving methods are difficult. They generally include additional help in some way, whether paid or offered by family members. If a caregiver is even close to burnout... Read more →


...Each has its fans but it’s worth checking out both sites before making purchases. There are others of course, but these two stand out due to their long track record. Read more →


...However, if you have the courage to stay in the valley and hold your attention in this descent, then you will say good bye to that which you were, before the trauma of loss, and go forward into the unknown half of yourself, that is unlived … the shadow. Read more →


Dear RT: I’m sorry about your family losing your dad and then seeing your mom’s cognition decline. This has been a seriously hard time for your family. First, let me assure you... Read more →


he most frustrating and painful part in this stew of choices is that, in most cases, there is no right answer because we are aiming at a moving target. Depending on where Mom is in her mind on that particular day, the Christmas tree may bring back wonderful memories or it could bring back that childhood horror. The gathering of loving relatives may seem familiar to her or she may be too lost in her dementia... Read more →


At that time, I had several other elders to care for as well as a son with chronic health problems. I didn’t have the time or energy to think of myself very often. Now, I look back and see that I didn’t do myself any favors. If I had a good friend going through what I experienced, I would offer them all the help I could. I would recognize... Read more →


...Caregivers, especially, may be even less likely than others to be looking forward to all of the hoopla associated with the expected happy holidays. Some of us dread even thinking about it. Read more →


...Now your parents both need help. Lots of help. Your kids still need you. Your spouse needs you. You feel like everyone wants a piece of you. You feel angry and that leads to guilt. Why does this feel so unfair? And where is the will to celebrate? What’s a caregiver to do? Read more →


Each year after Thanksgiving, I would make my rounds, decorating each elder’s apartment or nursing home room, planning how we would split our time between the visits, and striving to meet everyone’s needs. The guilt over taking so much time from my kids ate at me. The guilt over my mother not having the Christmas celebration she so coveted ate at me. My mother-in-law did not seem to care... Read more →