Entries categorized "Minding Our Elders Column" Feed

Dear KL: I understand what you’re saying and applaud you for thinking of your children ahead of time. Throughout the years, I’ve heard from caregivers who’ve lost a great deal both financially and emotionally due to caregiving responsibilities. Read more →


Dear Carol:  My mom has moderate dementia and she seems to like the idea of living in a care community. We’ve done all of the preliminary work, but the social worker at the assisted living facility recently told me that they wouldn’t want me to visit Mom for the first two weeks. Read more →


Dear Carol: My mother, 93, is mentally sharp and lives in her own retirement apartment. As would be expected, she has some physical problems including arthritis severe enough that she needed a hip replacement in her 70s. She uses a walker but her balance is iffy even with that. Read more →


Dad’s decided that he likes the idea of moving to the same assisted living facility where some friends live. I think that’s a great idea but my brother, who has Power of Attorney for Dad and lives 900 miles away, insists that because Dad has memory problems Read more →


Dear Carol: My parents are nearly 90. I have three sisters who are scattered around the country and I'm much younger than they are so we aren't particularly close. I stayed in the community where I grew up so I’m with my parents nearly every day. Read more →


Dear Carol: My mom is just 62 but she began showing symptoms of Alzheimer’s four years ago. She lives in a good nursing home and I visit nearly every day. What’s bothering me is Mother’s Day. I know that the nursing home will do a nice job Read more →


Dear Carol: My parents are in their 80s and beginning to have occasional problems with managing their medical appointments and medications. Since I live and work nearly 1000 miles away I can’t be with them enough to handle this Read more →


Dear Carol: My mom abused me during my childhood and I left home right after high school. I'm now nearly 40 and Mom, who is in her 60s, has developed Parkinson’s disease. She's beginning to need daily help and has asked me to move back home to take care of her. I don’t know if I can do this. Read more →


Dear Carol: My mother developed vascular dementia, personality issues, and speech problems after a stroke three years ago. She lives with me, and because of her difficult personality, my daughter no longer wants to bring my grandchildren here to visit. I retired early to care for Mom but now I feel trapped. Nothing I do for her is right. I’ve suggested that she might have a better life if she moved to assisted living and, surprisingly, she isn’t resistant though I know she’ll complain about them, too, if she moves. My sisters live out of the area so they are limited with what they can do. We have a highly rated assisted living facility in town, but thinking about moving Mom to any kind of care makes me feel like a selfish failure. I know that I’m depressed and burned out but I don’t know how to fix it. – CL Read more →